Day 67: Inner positive energy

Today has been a great day, if not an ideal one that I dream of.

My choclate and almond cake trial came out superb and I was so tempted to eat a piece or two of it!

In the evening, I had good score at the driving practice too. It all made me so positive. I am realizing my steps though baby steps are taking me somewhere forward and life is not bad afterall.

Life is ofcourse a challenge which keeps challenging but in times of stuggles if we cherish these small happy and successful moments, life will seem slow but progressing. This is what I am going to remember tomorrow (and days to follow) because the list of immediate goals and deadlines is quite big.

I need energy and positivity. I am sure it comes more from within than from outside.

Day 64: उसे लगता है

उसे लगता है जिंदगी
ऐसी ही चलेगी,
उसे लगता है जिंदगी
ऐसे ही भागेगी!
उसे लगता है जिंदगी
ऐसे ही उसका इम्तहान लेगी
हमेशा और हमेशा....

लेकिन कोई उसे कोई कहता क्यों नहीं
नहीं, नहीं....ऐसा नहीं है!
जिंदगी इम्तहान लेगी
और लेती रहेगी
लेकिन हार नहीं मानोगे तो
पकड़ पाओगे इसकी रफ़्तार
और अपना सुकून.
कोई कहे उसे, कोई समझाए उसे
जिंदगी मे इन्द्रधनुष भी है
बारिश के बाद,
बस ढूँढना है अपना सूरज
जो चमका दे अपनी बूंदों को.

कोई कहे उसको,
हार न मानना,
पकडे रहना जिंदगी के इम्तहान को ,
जीत पक्की है
और जीवन भी!

Day 63: I am in love!

I have realized recently I love him-

the grandness,

the beauty,

the noise,

the calmness

all mesmerizes me….

I am so much in love with him-

the ‘mer’.

I often think,

what it would be to be with him

when the clouds and thunder go hand in hand

and wet me, and my heart…

often I imagine it’s beauty and it’s ghastly silhouette

in rains….

one day I would sit by his side

when it is raining

and it will surely wet me with

his sound, his vigour to reach out to me.

Yes, I am in so much love with him-

the ‘mer’!

*************************

In French, the ‘mer’ is the ‘sea’. :-)

What did you think, I was talking about ;-)

Vichode jinag de yaar....Punjabi sufi song

 The link to this song is  - http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=09v3o2t1_bU
Movie - Dus Kahaniya
Singer - Shafqat Ali Khan
Lyrics - Ambar Hoshyiarpuri

Vichode jinah de yaar de jaande, uh jeoundiyan jee mar jaande
Vang sudaaiyan
yaar di yaad vich ronde te kurlaonde
preet de naal koi akhiyan na laye
rog hi jarda sadiyan sataye
vichodiyan ne maar liya
kiven jeevan mainu samajh na aaye
zindagi vich * vala zeher haththi kho liya
thoda jinna pyar deke saara sukh kho liya
na main jaagan na main sovan
chori sajjana to rovan
sunjhe aasan vaale boohe kade khola kade thova
sajjan bekadari di mainu har dum yaad sataye
kiven jeevan mainu samajh na aaye
pyar wali khed khedi jhalle ho gaye haan
aisa kitta pyar asi ikalle ho gaye haan
pehlon has has laayiyan
phir ditiyan judaaiyan
mere pyar diyan uhne zara kadaran na payian
sachcha yaar kehnde uhnu jehda lagiyaan di laaj nibhaye
kiven jeevan mainu samajh na aaye

Day 62: Languages

Languages, the gate to communication and understanding culture. I have been in France now for about a year and I have realized through out that the French are very connected and close to their language. Most of them do not speak English, well I am not talking about entire France/South of France but a general statement (which is quite true).  So, I made a small effort and spent hundreds of hours learning French. I am very happy I can convey my message though I am still hotch potch in tenses and prepositions. Well, they will surely come with more and more listening and speaking. But this has already been so easy now to talk to people, go shopping, travel with public transport, make calls to crèche and schools and speak in French….it is so convenient if one knows the native language.

I had always a dream to see myself speaking some other language with the same ease as I speak Hindi and English. But, I never thought it would be a foreign language. I had a lot of Marathi friends, so thought would learn it some day. Some days I thought I would learn Gujrati, other days I thought Bengali….! Well, as you can see, I was always fascinated by languages but never got any chance or tried to learn any dedicatedly. Thanks to the French people, who are hard with English, I know some French now and I am proud to able to manage here.  

Yesterday, I was watching the movie ‘Dus Kahaniya (ten stories)’ and in one of the movies, it was Amruta Singh & Minisha Lamba as mother and daughter (ofcourse, respectively). This particular story had a tragic end and it ends with a beautiful song in Punjabi.  Well, I didn’t understand it word to word, but it was soulful and the lyrics sounded so sweet that I fell in love with this language. I think, every language’s folk songs or thoughts are very sweet and has the power (not even ability) to touch any one’s soul. Now, I would like to learn Punjabi so that I can understand soulful songs like this.

One of my favourite poets is Rabindra Nath Tagore….and to read his work and other Bangla literature, I would like to try my hands on Bengali too. Wow……beautiful dreams……I am happy! :-)

कुछ भाषाए बहुत मिठास भरी होती है, और मै उनकी मिठास से अनजानी नहीं रहना चाहती, इसीलिए यह सपना भर रही हू अपनी आँखों मै, की एक दिन काफी सारी language बोल पाऊ. This is not for others but just for my own sake. I see it as a big achievement to see myself speaking different languages.

Well, for now French is only the beginning…..

Day 61: Mothers

I used to wonder often that the kids who had beautiful mothers might be so happy about their mothers. My innocent myth was shattered when I became a mother. I am an average looking girl and my motherhood has made me realised that a kid loves his parents not what they are but he loves them by the measure of love and comfort he gets in their company. It does not matter if a parent is exceptionally beautiful. Love does not come from the beauty, it is the other way round- beauty comes with love.

Every parent dreams of a beautiful life for his kid and also toils for the kids all their lives. It is such a revealation to be a parent. It is not easy. The path is full of responsibilites, sacrifices and compromises. The day has to start before the kid wakes up and the day sometimes also starts when the kid goes to bed at night. It is the passage in between that determines the satisfaction of the kid and the parents. How well the parents have fared in the daytime to give a worthy day to the kid is so important. This is true especially for the kids who are at home and do not go to any daycare or school. The home has to be his first school and the parents have to be the teachers. It is the imagination that plays the role so pivotal in making kids learn something or the other, every day. That is and that should be the beauty of parents. The physical appearance has nothing to do with the warmth, the love, the joy and the learning that the kid gets or must get from his parents.

Day 60: Glamour and hard work

My breakfast today was combined with some phone calls from some friends (actually a few ones that I have in France), and only then I realise I am such a talkative person. Otherwise, I am so engrossed in my own world, my responsibilites and duties that I hardly speak to anyone.

With one of my friends, I just started to talk about Indian & French culture and when it is the right time to move back to India before the kids starts getting affected (iske pehle ke unko 'hawa' lag jaye)....then we shifted to TV shows we follow, we talked about Indian Idol, we talked about choreographer, Saroj Khan and her biography....etc etc.

Coming back to Saroj Khan, when I think of her or take/read her name, MADHURI flashes before my eyes. (so, I finished my breakfast watching her dances in 'Devdas'). She is such a beautiful dancer. I wish I could learn danse from her. Dancing is my passion but well I am quite an average dancer. Madhuri is my God .....I just love her, well I am only one of her crores of fans.....(feels bad :-)) )

I was wondering how much hard work these celebrity people have to do. The glamour, the name n fame, the money, the beautiful clothes, accessories, limelight.....they have it all, but it is not attained with a magic stick. It all comes with hard work, connections, sacrifices, routine n disciplined life, self control and immense determination. When I was at Cannes film festival in May this year, I saw the red carpet ceremony....was mesmerized to see so many stars on the red carpet and hundreds of fans cheering and getting mad for one autograph/handshake/close view etc. I thought these stars have toiled hard to be at this red carpet and experience this dazzling crowd of fans, it all does not come overnight. And today, all these came again to my head that hard work indeed pays you in life. It may be late, but surely, it will get paid one day in life. We are not to lose hope and give up, because who knows we are pretty close to winning.

With these thoughts (and ofcourse the energy n happiness from viweing Madhuri's danses), I am determined to win my battles and emerge as a winner....Good luck to me and all those who think same!

*My spellings for dance/danse are as a result of English/French (language that I am learning and practising now, being in France).